"Greater love has no one than this,
that he lay down his life for his friends."

John 15:13

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i needa exco meeting.. before all my ideas disappear.

yay for weirdly timed holidays! i have pw tomorrow even though it's a public holiday so we're going early to find good seats at macs before the crowd comes. but no macs for me man. i'm going to get fit soon. like soonish.. maybe i should go running

*shut up jie* (choked guffaw in background) hmf.

met the gang today =) and justina.

i dont want to leave. and i need to not be prideful. and i need to talk to sammie.

i need school to start. and The Essay to be over.

geez can't i just accept the holiday?

I'm pressed but not crushed persecuted not abandoned
Struck down but not destroyed
I'm blessed beyond the curse for his promise will endure
And his joy's gonna be my strength

EXAMS ARE OFFICIALY OVER wooOot!

yeap and already i've cleared out my desk and filed my stray pieces of paper (jie called this purging =?) yup and i've changed my blogskin and added a happy happy song that makes people grin and roll their eyes all at the same time.

got home and watched the matrix. nothing like a philosophical whimsical to celebrate the end of the exams! keanu reeves is so cute *beams*

i've suddenly realised that my blog isnt as private as i'd like now.. it came when i wanted to blog and i realised i couldn't coz people actually read it. ohwells. back to good old pen and paper then.

this week of promos has been really really relaxing. which is why i look forward to the week itself - coz the worst is totally over. and now i've only got china studies tomorrow and no matter how hard i try to psyche myself into getting nervous so i'll study a little bit harder, it's just so not working. which is why i'm blogging now *shrugs*

righto.

went for a mission getogether on thursday night- so good to see everyone again =) and just to like talk. i kinda miss debriefs. hm. yeah it's strange to think i've only known them for only almost a year! it's only been 9 months since the trip and wow how much my life has changed. but i'll leave that for a year end evo =)

anyway so fizzix was the day after at like 2.30 forgot my calculator until the seragoon station praise God it wasn't any further! when it says you'll be reminded of all things it really covers everything huh =D anyway it was alright. managed to do most of the questions and yeah. ms huang took my pen and didn't return it! moop. whatde.

after it was done the teacher went up and talked about h3 fizzix and everyone was like D: are you serious?! then after that was done people started rejoicing coz most of them are done with their promos. me and minfang and peifen just mooped in a corner haha j/j

went out for dinner at vivo - do not go to the mussel guys or whatever it is coz it's pseudo fine dining (they serve super small portions with big prices and play cool music) rawr. secret recipe for dessert was nyummy *happy place*

went home and saw this little girl on the train - couldnt have been more than 2 and she was soo adorably innocent and i was thinking 'ohmypoorthing she has a loooOOOOoong way to go from there' just thinking of all the evilsneevil ways of influence that could sneak up with smoky tendrils was pretty scary and it's just a huge miracle that not everyone has turned out like crap.

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went out shopping on sat to much fruitfulness yay =) and i watched grey's too! which was alright. mmf.

meeting the gang on tuesday yay!

wowza it's finally past mid week!

gp was on monday, same as jo's english compo and the narrative that came out was MIRACLES like omgeraaaaargh! moop. i miss writing, like stuff that wasn't real. neways so education didn't come out so that kinda sucked so i did the crime one which methought didnt go too badly.. but compre aq was a bit. like. =? but ohwell.

tuesday was a free day yay! so finished up my econs and started on china studies like finally haha so that was alright.. oh AND i went swimming!! *browned* yay that was severely by far the most accomplished day for a long long while =D and did i mention i watched grey's?

hm. yup so yesterday got up for morning worship coz dear sammie was leading and having a violent debate at the edge of my bed whether to get up or not, i figured she's one of the few people that can make me get up at 6am in the morning *feel proud samantha lim* but it was all good =) studied my hungus file of econs when everyone else was having their H1paper and well econs was.. pretty alrightish i guesstest.

case study was okay? opec and the petrol thingy came out which was like *relief* coz oligpoly wasnt in the essay thingus. essay was like writing mania, 4 parts in 45 minutes is absolutely insane. went home and slept coz my brain was feeling abused.

today's maths, and tomorrow's fizzix and i dunno but i'm sort of past caring now.

phrantic phonecalls are not the best thing to wake up to in the morning. seriously.

this week has been.. kinda strangey and timewarpy.



fizzix mock was rather disastrous. went for consultation like twice in a week haha and i think i'm getting better. i know how to do heat capacity nonsense now =)



didnt go to school for lessons today coz fizzix was cancelled. wonder how many people actually went for it. *shrugs* after september it'll be so much more fun. i made a Christmas card list the other day during maths and i counted up to like 50 plus people =\ not counting acquaintances. but methinks if i start in october i should be able to make it



superly duperly can't wait for promos to be over. but i need to start on china studies. humbug. maths papers take so long to do, but i think i'm getting more used to it. totally had to de-fry my brain after though with 2 episodes of greys =P i so earned it. ha



i'm getting better at chess.

yay today was rather productive if i dont say so myself. did 2 nice charts comparing market structure and understood all the bits that i missed in lecture =D

feels good to fiiiiinally started on econs even though there's one heck of a lot of things to do tomorrow: gp crime essay (gragh), study fizz for mock on monday, do econs worksheet, pw bits.

moop.

even moopier was the man u -liverpool game. *no comment*

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2 chronicles 20: the prayer of jehosophat <-- jazzy name

when he heard that massive armies were marching up against him the first thing he did was to have a huge prayer meeting involving the whole city. he said:

'We do not know what to do, but our eyes are upon you'

and God told said:

'Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God's ... You will not have to fight this battle ... Go out to face them tomorrow, and the LORD will be with you.'

and jehosophat said to the people:

'Have faith in the LORD your God and you will be upheld; have faith in his prophets and you will be successful'

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no points for guessing what the result was.

it's not that jehosophat did nothing, well he sort of did do nothing but that's not the point. the point is that God told him to do nothing that's why he did nothing - he just faced it, with God next to him.

it's so good to be free.

i just realised that i dont have dates on these entries.. must've deleted that when i was fiddling with the html..

it's like birthday mania these few weeks, starting off with mine haha.

anyway, i had a rather rude shock yesterday at fizz consultation. is that what you really think of it and how could you be so tactless. obviously. i have to admit i was really shaken by what she said even if it was in jest perhaps. one can only hope huh. but it has to come from somewhere and it well, sounded sarcastic.

man i miss ethel muches. and eden and kelly.

dad and jo are going to nz on the 10th - 21st nov.. =( if only if only. nah but i'm totally in 2 minds with it coz ocip will be awesome going with min fang, chesed and weiwen but on the other hand.. it's new zealand... and open house. which is like the day after we leave. going to be severely short of ppl and i wanna go to open house! hmf.

i got caught for having a short skirt today. like seriously. looks for russian circus. my skirt is longer than most people's and yeah. sulks. i tell you that woman has it in for student leaders. what wouldnt i tell that whatsit if she understood english. rah. i didnt mean that.

maybe i grew some more.. oh jo won't be pleased.

loves school mornings. after that is pretty meh.

it's absolutely pouring outside with no intention of stopping aaaand i'm going to sleep soon! yay =D

anyway i'm so glad to be back in school, having finally woken up one's idea and feeling all up-and-at'em which is fantastic. you know i think it's seriously the praising God the first thing in the morning - it really makes a difference for your whole day and makes it awesome. yup =) so glad to see everyone today again! got plenty of 'oh you cut your hair!'s which was well. yeah.

sucks that there's no more sfc til promos are over though.. methinks i'm a major cca junkie... and proud of it! you know, other cca's are just coz you like it, or you're good at it but the effect is pretty short termed. but in the case of sfc, it's not about attaining something you can see, something like a trophy or whatnot - it's dealing with major stuff here; spiritually and physically. and it doesnt even stop when we leave sa, or even this world. which is rather quite amazing when you think about it. whatever little event that sfc does, it's triggering something bigger in realms we can't even imagine with this huge ripple effect .. and it makes me feel rather small. haha. nothing like a good dose of smallness to put you right sometimes

i'm just psyched coz i'm baaaaaaack!

how can i keep from singing your praise?

i was still feeling a bit iffy in the afternoon, but this put it all back into rightness. reminds me of the first hearing God's voice session..

Emmanuel
Hillsong

Holy HolyI will bow before
My Lord and King
Hallelujah
You have come to us
You make all things new

Emmanuel
Jesus Christ
You'll never let me go
My Sheperd King
You're watching over me
Emmanuel

So amazing
You have named the stars
Of the deepest night
Still You love me
You have called my name
I will follow You

Holy Holy
God Almighty
There is none like You

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In the arms of Your mercy I find rest

HALLELUJAH

nuts school is starting again. or maybe that's not to nutsy. coz then i'll be forced to get my act together and actually start studying. this holiday has been academically wasted and even physically coz i didnt even get to go swimming or exercising in the leastest. i think the only big accomplishment was finishing the whole harry potter series. as in reading, not like.. eating. yeah. whatever.

not to mention i'm completely like dry at the moment, although today was good and

'.. like coming up for fresh air. It’s like I was drowning and you saved me..'

not that it's referring to a person or anything but yeah. the whole dry and drowning completely contradicts but oh well.

'she could've come up with a better analogy..

oh give her a break she's hungover..'

minus the second bit but you get the drift.

what was i saying?

oh yeah. worship was great even though half the usual people went to ymlc. =)

Eagle's Wings
Hillsong United

Here I am waiting
Abide in me I pray
Here I am longing
For You

Hide me in Your love
Bring me to my knees
May I know Jesus
More and more

Come live in me
All my life
Take over
Come breathe in me
I will rise
On eagle's wings

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so simple. it's been a while. feel like there's been a huge weight over me which until today i realised was my expectations for promos, surprise surprise. and it's funny, not really, how i forgot something so basic as trust, as committing it to God - havent i been doing that for the whole year, really?

and i dont think i've ever been through a tougher week just battling against my own will, which is surprisingly strong when it comes to slacking. and i guess it's just a good wakeup call, before i get too complacent.

but despite the wonderful learning points i'm just so glad it's over,

"For nothing is impossible with God." Luke 1:37

alright i'm back. ha. ubetawachit

i've been feeling incredibly lazy, since wednesday when i took the day off and broke my momentum. i havent touched anything academic since then which well is not extremely great since now the promos are in like 2 weeks. and yeah, i'm rather quite .. screwed. yeah

it's just that i'm getting the whole i feel like being young again, not in a i'm so old kind of way, but just an extremely deep deep longing to be back in the place of green and bark and sea and ringing bells and trees and shooting thingys and bicycles. and i really miss the wind. i havent thought so much about it until that night and just had that ache to go back again. and now dad and jo are going back at the end of this year to visit graham who's sick, and i might not be able to go coz of ocip and now, i just hope in a i-dont-really way that ocip will be cancelled and i'll be able to see keli and eden and kelly and hamish and wes again. and the whole a class gang again. and take pictures this time. so yeah, feeling kinda miserableish and so not in the mood to do anything but mope and see what harry's doing.

and i cant wait to get bck into the swing of things coz i really need someone to bop me on the head and help me wake up my idea coz i feel so out of it like my eyes are just tired all the time and i cant even bring myself to bring myself before coz i dont feel.. right.. enough to.

plus i feel like a lump of lard. not in a physical way but in a inside way. and i had my tetanus yesterday but that's completely irrelevant coz it doesnt even hurt anymore.

anyway, i watched juno today. i know i'm like a couple of million months late but whatever. like absolute loves.

'he is the cheese to my macaroni'

Go Light Your World
Kathy Troccoli

There is a candle in every soul
Some brightly burning, some dark and cold
There is a Spirit who brings a fire
Ignites a candle and makes His home

So Carry your candle, run to the darkness
Seek out the hopeless, confused and torn
Hold out your candle for all to see it
Take your candle, and go light your world
Take your candle, and go light your world

Frustrated brother, see how he's tried to
Light his own candle some other way
See now your sister, she's been robbed and lied to
Still holds a candle without a flame

So Carry your candle, run to the darkness
Seek out the lonely, the tired and worn
Hold out your candle for all to see it
Take your candle, and go light your world
Take your candle, and go light your world

Cause We are a family whose hearts are blazing
So let's raise our candles and light up the sky
Praying to our Father, in the name of Jesus
Make us a beacon in darkest times

So Carry your candle, run to the darkness
Seek out the helpless, deceived and poor
Hold out your candle for all to see it
Take your candle, and go light your world

today was my mum's birthday, so i spent the day eating.

coz my mum seems to like seeing people eat, while eating too.

sounds strange, but this is mum =)

SO. got up at an insane hour (oh mum what i do for you) - 8.30, left the house at 9 with the whole family half asleep, or rather half the family asleep whichever.. for dome which only opens at 10 which we realised when we got there at like 9.30 but oh well.

ate a big breakfast - sausages, hash brown, bacon, scrambled eggs, bread, jam, tomato, mushrooms and a hot chocolate *grins fatly* i was so full i was going to throw up but at least it was good stuffs.

then we went back home and while everyone was outside weeding (new family activity??) D: i fell asleep on the couch for like an hour and a half hahah. then i woke up and we went for lunch.

(so far i've woken up, ate, slept, woken up, ate)

then jo and i went to watch wallE and i ate more popcorn while sitting down. then i went home and ate dinner.

to summarise -

woke up, ate, slept, woke up, ate, ate, ate...

i felt like going for a run just now. which is big for me.

i miss my happy happy childhood